The 90's called, they want their platforms back

"OMG Mel B, can I have your autograph?" "Oh wait, I'm sorry, you mean you're wearing black leather platform boots and you're not a Spice Girl?" End scene.

One of the biggest mistakes trend "followers" make is that they apply one trend to ALL styles and situations. They take it and run with it. For example: Sock bun out to dinner? yes. At the gym? no. Literally running with it. SO...when you say platforms are making their debut again since the 90's, get this (in black, NOT in camo obvs) and not this.

Get edgy, not grungy. Get fabulous, not frumpy.

Black trench coat, rando backpack and 90's knee high Magic Mike meets Spice Girls belt buckle boots...no.

It's a bird it's a plane

It's Jack the Ripper?

Everything about this screams death, sadness, bird funeral, mourning...basically anything other than chic fur coat. Coco can't even. 

Speaking of the devil

Spotted. Just outside my elevator. I boarded the elevator and snapped this unfortunately not so rare sighting. For those millenium babies who aren't sure what I am presenting, I give you the Chinese slipper. It was a fad that did not die quick enough and like cockroaches, they cannot be destroyed. #boycotttheslipper