The Ratchet and the Homeless

Ok I know this is the worlds worst picture but I was so stunned it took me a while to pull my phone out to snap a pic. Here we have our modern day beauty and the beast: the ratchet and the homeless. I have seen my fair share of odd couples but this one takes the day old cake. The male looked about in his fifties. He wore a blue jumpsuit and had long straggly greasy hair slicked back to cover his

balding front. The lady looked the same age, with dark dark poofed hair. She wore a fur black coat, cheetah jeggings and heeled boots. OH and this is in the shoprite parking lot on a Sunday morning. 

Happy Monday 

Coco lent me these

One of the six pairs of shoes I bought over the past few days. Coconuts, take advantage of sales!! It's a sin if you don't. Off to take these bad boys for a walk. Xoxo

Speaking of the devil

Spotted. Just outside my elevator. I boarded the elevator and snapped this unfortunately not so rare sighting. For those millenium babies who aren't sure what I am presenting, I give you the Chinese slipper. It was a fad that did not die quick enough and like cockroaches, they cannot be destroyed. #boycotttheslipper

The midlife brisis

There is a new trend hitting the streets of NYC that I would like to call the midlife brisis (bra crisis).

Yes, I ran after them and snapped pics. I was in awe. It's like A) you're not 19 and hanging with your friends B) I don't even wear that unless it's a sheer cute top and I'm going to a bar C) like, what is your bra ?! Your bra shows your age ladies. And in this case, your lack of style and common sense. No words. 

First day of work outfit

I wouldn't want to overdo it on the first day. Less is more. Doesn't coco look great?

Warning: brief nudity

Imagine this situation: Alarm is blaring at 7 am and you have 45 minutes to pull yourself together to make an 8 am bus to the city for a job interview. Teeth, hair, makeup...SHIT I have like five minutes left. You rip the outfit off the mannequin and make sure you look FABULOUS...therefore spending your last seconds examining every pore in your face. You are about to run out of your room when you look back and see this sad, sad image: Coco naked. What's a girl to do? Miss the only bus to make sure her inanimate friend is fully clothed or let it be and solve the solution when she returns? The sane, less psychotic solution is clear. However, that is not the case and it is a heartbreaking situation in which I hate leaving Coco in. This is simply a post of acknowledgement. Sorry Coco. 

Coco can't even....

I don't even know where to begin with this ensemble. I was surprised to not see this outfit in the police blotter when I purchased the Sunday paper just moments later because this woman has committed a serious fashion crime...I practically choked on my iced coffee and could have really used her cloth skirt to clean up the mess that would have been made. I'm writing this because coco can't even, just can't. On such a beautiful fall day, how could anyone even think of such a nauseating combination. She lost me at what seems to be thick pedal pushers rolled above the knee...I can only pray those are for poor circulation issues. Let's just ignore the dark brown peep toe wedges that were just....Just. We move to the tweed, loin cloth skirt with a fringed hemline that was possibly an entry way rug used by my early ancestors. She then topped it off with a brown tank, untucked and pulled down. Probably to hide her heinous skirt. Then tied it together with a braided brown belt...she would have been better off with a bow. And let's not forget this award winning beaded, satin purse whose trend died out long ago with the Chinese slippers that were sold on the streets of NYC in the 90's. My dear Coconuts, my loyal readers, I present to you my first fashion crimester. Assuming she just left church, I will name her "the sinner".

Because it's freezing out

Coco Says...

Even though she LOVES the fall season, she can't let go of her favorite summer maxis. This fab find from Zara is one of a kind. Since she's a Francesca's Collection jewelry hoarder, obviously she had to throw on a crowd favorite and pair the outfit with her white and wood blocked sandal wedges. I'll help her search the closet later for a light jacket. Adios summer. xoxo Coco

Sup Fashionistas

 

Coco Says...

Orange is the New Black should never apply to leather jackets. In fact, orange should never be the new anything unless it is referring to the TV show. Nonetheless, Coco just bought this non-orange black quilted leather jacket from H&M (which will soon be added to our closet). It only made sense to pair it with her new Alexander McQueen scarf, which was her recent birthday present, Zara top and MK glasses. Lookin good Coco.